Erratic life

Well the quote of the day in the newspaper was apt:

“ Obviously, where art has it over life is in the matter of editing. Life can be seen to suffer from a drastic lack of editing. It stops too quick, or else it goes on too long. Worse, its pacing is erratic. ”

Larry McMurtry

Must've been the big storm we're waiting for which wound everyone up - as if we need another winter storm. I managed to squeeze in some 'talking down off the ledge' activities with the continued purging - I'm up to over a dozen large recycling bags full and the shredder motor was in serious peril this afternoon.

I stopped for a massage after work and I told the therapist she had saved me physically as I hadn't been for almost three months and I think I'm taller now. I'm off to sit in the sauna as that's recommended to 'remove the toxins which have been loosened' which is one good way to end the week.

I had read the report of the study quoted below, which had in a timely fashion been released in time for International Women's Day but the editorial by one of my favorite role models (Slacker Mom) was even better:

Nothing like Lysol to make her wild for you

By GAIL LETHBRIDGE
Fri. Mar 14 - 6:10 AM


FORGET THE ROMANTIC FLOWERS, the box of chocolates and the racy lacy lingerie, boys.

If you really want to get your gal in the mood, take home a nice bottle of vintage Lysol, fill a bucket with steaming hot water and try on a pair of yellow rubber gloves.

Pour a bit of the Lysol into that bucket of hot water and take it all upstairs, Big Boy.

Head for the bathroom. Get down on your knees and scrub that toilet bowl like your life depended on it.

Oh yeah, baby. Let’s have some of that Toilet Duck, too.

There’s nothing like the sight of a man scrubbing a toilet bowl to get her in the mood.

And if you really want some action, check out the kitchen floor after you’re finished scrubbing the bathroom.

See that buildup in the corner? That hasn’t been touched in years. Go for it, Big Fella. She’ll think you’re George Clooney.

And you can throw out all those bottles of Old Spice too. The scent of disinfectant is the thing that will make her wild for you.

Or at least this is the gist of a new report that says married men get more sex from their wives if they do more housework. This little piece of obviousness comes from something called the Council on Contemporary Families.

The co-authors — a psychologist and a sociologist, both men — report that "equitable sharing of housework is associated with higher levels of marital satisfaction and sometimes more sex too."

Since when do we need trained psychologists and sociologists to do studies that state the obvious? You’d think they’d just cracked the double helix the way they’re waving this study around.

What are they going to do next? A study that says the grass is green?

I wonder how many bathrooms they could have cleaned in the time it took to do that study. And how many bottles of Lysol they could have purchased with the money they were paid to do the study?

Women have been saying this for ages. Were the men not listening or something? Is this why they had to do this study? Because they thought it was news?

Well, men, listen up: Housework is the female Viagra — if you’re the one doing the scrubbing, cleaning and disinfecting, or a least splitting it 50-50 with your better half.

So the next time you get love on the mind, don’t look at her with bedroom eyes. Gaze at her with I’m-going-to-scrub-the-toilet-bowl eyes.

If you throw in a good basement tidy up and a couple loads of laundry, you could very well be looking at days or weeks of perma-smile, if you catch my drift.

Most married women aren’t complicated or frigid or dysfunctional. They’re just exhausted from carrying the burden of housework and child care. Share that burden and you never know where things could go.

It’s simple. It’s free. It’s obvious. It’s housework. Think of the possibilities, men.

( glethbridge@herald.ca)


Freelance slob Gail Lethbridge hates housework but loves a clean house. Visit her blog: giftedtypist.com.

I have another suggestion and that would be to...have a functioning oven. Apparently a local oven shipment is arriving on Tuesday which is fortunate as that was the last allowable day in my world. This is in part because daughter #3 is arriving for Easter with a guest from her residence as well as her boyfriend, daughter #2 will be home as well and they will be expecting and I am reassuring they will have a baked ham for Easter Sunday. Or else!